Karen’s blog

Do you ever wonder if you’re running a race that’s not yours, or the gun shot and everyone is already ahead of you? What do you do then? Most people would say give up because if they are already way ahead why try. This gets me thinking, about how this is in with everything I am going through now.

School and grades, I admit I had the worst grades but that was because I really did lose the race, I felt like I was running someone else’s race and why should I try if I am losing. I just didn’t do what I knew I could. I paid for it too, I could have gotten into algebra this year but instead I am in a really slow group in a way, I am the only one that raises my hand really. I am working hard this year because I realized that it’s not someone else’s race it’s everyone’s race, just one race for everyone where everyone can win but no one tries to or wants to; it’s a race were the gun shot goes off when no one is ready and by the time they realize that the race started they just give up and don’t even try, it’s a race where everyone can win but no one does. I guess you can call it a race of life. But also I want to prove those kids that called me dumb wrong, just because I am not in the smartest group does not mean I am dumb it just means I did not try hard the year before. on the last day of school my mom brought me to the principals office because she was scared I would fail the 8th grade, he looked at my grades and looked me straight in the face and said, ” You are right Karen, why try when you clearly are to dumb to even make the honor roll.” that got me mad and I wanted to prove him wrong but each report card I had a C in either science or Spanish, but this turn I got an A in Spanish and a B in science, so I am going to prove him wrong.

Drama and friends, this is a big factor. A girl in my school that uses to be my friend said the worst thing to me, “Karen why should I be nice to you, you’re not even worth it, because your nothing and you have no friends.” I am not going to lie this hurt me a little, but this is one of those times when you know who your real friends are. My best friend Asiastopped the girl as she was walking and said, “HOLD UP! Don’t you talk to her like that; you should not say that coming from someone that only has sympathy friends because they feel bad for you having no one. And you should speak for yourself because I for one am happy to be Karen’s friend and I are happy she is not your friend because you don’t deserve a wonderful girl like her to give you advice and drop everything because you need help with something.”

But you know those days when you feel like everything can’t get any worse. Like this morning when I was getting off the bus I tripped and fell, perfect way to start the morning. Then I trip in front of my crush. Want to know how I lived through the rest of the day? I laughed, I fell off the bus I laughed and joked about it, I tripped in front of him, I laughed and said “well this is a great way to say hello.” he laughed back. See now when you are feeling like you can’t hold on anymore, or your going to break down; just laugh, about something that happened that was funny or turn the bad thing and look at it in a good way. Like falling in front of my crush was a bad thing but now we have something to joke about with each other.

I will end my post with this. I thought about it after writing a post before about if tomorrow will be better; I thought of something to answer it by and I think it works for both posts.

You can’t have a better tomorrow when you are always thinking about yesterdays mistakes.

Think about that

My dad once said “life is about falling; living is about getting back up.” He told me this when I was so mad because nothing was going right for me, me and him talked it over and he said that its not going to go right for you, you have to make it that way. And I finally figured out what he meant by that. He meant that life is not just going to be you want something to happen it does, no; life is about wanting something to happen and getting the guts to make it happen. There is a song by Taylor swift called “Fearless” in an interview they asked her why she would write a song about never being afraid, this was her answer…

“The song is not about never being afraid it’s about being fearless. Fearless is being terrified. But jumping anyway. Fearless is living in spite of those things that scare you to death. Fearless is having the courage to say goodbye to someone who only hurts you, but you can’t breathe without. Fearless is getting back up and fighting for what you want over and over again…even though every time you’ve tried before, you’ve lost. Fearless is having faith that someday things will change. Fearless is telling that special guy that you like him; it’s learning how to deal with the silence after you tell the guy not what he might say. Fearless is allowing yourself to cry on the bathroom floor.”

I don’t think fearless is that, to me fearless is making a mistake and learning from it, it’s getting nervous around your crush but talking to him anyway. It loves someone no matter what age you are. It’s dancing in the rain. It’s not caring who’s watching you act strange. It’s not missing an opportunity when it comes. It’s not getting mad of a C on a test. You see fearless is not having any fears; it’s will to look past them.

Sorry that i have not been writing those in a while but here is the weekly riddle, the answer will be posted next Tuesday.

A black dog is sleeping
in the middle of a black road
that has no streetlights
and there is no moon.
A car coming down the road
with its lights off
steers |a r o u n d |the dog.
how did the driver know the dog was there..?

Comment me your answer!!!!

When you think about it, the drama in school right now is going to follow you through the rest of your life. there are going to be the people that are mean to you for no reason at all, there’s going to be the girls that get whatever they want, the jerk guys, and let’s not forget the friends that are in “love” with a guy. So you are really just getting ready for life now. I know I’m young but I know a lot more about the stuff that goes on then you think, so here is some advice for the wonderful future.

1) DON’T settle for a jerk of a boyfriend/girlfriend, if he/she does not respect you the way you want to be respected then dump him/her.

2) This is for people (girls mostly) that are from the ages 12 to 16. YOU DON’T LOVE HIM!!!!! So stop saying you’re in love because I bet you don’t know what that is (I don’t even know) and you will probably dump him in a month or two.

3) DON’T fall behind in school, trust me it sucks, people will make fun of you as well because they think you are stupid so show them they are wrong.

4) Yes there are going to be those annoying teacher/bosses throughout your life, all I can say is try to get to their good side and if that does not work then just deal with it.

5) Don’t be afraid to take chances, you will regret not doing something later in life.

6) DONT START DRAMA!!!!!!!! and don’t say you don’t start it you solve it because that is not true, if it is not about you or your CLOSEST FRIENDS then just ignore it, no one need more stress in their life.

7) Don’t just look at the bad; find the good in every situation and the just roll with it.

But I think that the most important thing I can tell you is to be yourself, don’t be someone you’re not because (trust me on this one) you will end up hating who you become; you can’t go back either too which kind of sucks as well.

Life is not all bad, I guess what I am trying to say is that there are going to be some bad stuff that happens to you but you know what? I would not want to go back and change all the bad things that have happened to me, because I learned from it and if I did change it….. I would still have a twofaced friend that tried to start stuff just to try to get me to break and a backstabbing best friend that believes everything the twofaced one tells her, also I would be a push over; but I changed that, one day I told the twofaced girl off and the backstabber well the name explains it all because she took the twofaced side, but if I never did that yea I would not have to deal with the drama and fights and my grades would have been better but also I would have never meet real friends that tell me the truth and I can trust.

I guess what I am trying to say as an end statement is that….. with every 1 bad there is 2 good and you can’t have a rainbow without a little rain, so don’t run from the storm…. learn how to dance in the rain.

You know how people say that is will be better tomorrow, well how do they know? It might be even worse tomorrow.  So why say it  then? Why would you say that to cheer someone up but then it just brings them down when it doesn’t happen? Maybe it is a mind treat to make you think it will be better so it will. I guess you never know until tomorrow comes around.

If some offered for you to have a record deal and tour with your favorite band, but you had to leave your school and home and be home schooled and live on the road. Would you take it? Yea. Why? It is the change of a life time how could I pass that up, and my parents would yell but I would still take it and my friends would be happy for me. And the people I hate would be jealous and I would be so popular.

If you could go to the best school ever, but you had to leave your friends and live in a different state for high school. Would you do it? yea. Why? Well if it is a good school then my friends would understand and we could hang out at times, and I could make new friends.

If someone offered you pot. Would you take it? No. why? Pot is bad for you and it can kill my grades and my parents would get mad and my friends would hate me and I would be alone.

Did you notice how with all three questions the answer had to do with what the person’s parents or friends would do or think? What happened to what we thought or did? Did you realize that once we all become teenager what we think is what no one cares about? Remember when you could trust more people then just yourself? ”No one cares.” is the saying mostly spoken to someone who said what they thought. Now in high school and middle school you can only say what they other people want to hear or you will be made fun of, also you can only know as much as the other kids know or they will call you a nerd. When was it bad to like to read and learn about a certain subject? When was it bad to say what you thought was right even though it might not have been? When was it band to like a band that was not as good as another? Now people look through your iPod and are like ” this band is stupid, they stink.” and I just and to answer back “well good thing it’s not your iPod it is mine.” now people make fun of you because they think the band you like stinks. For example… country music, I really like it, but the kids in my school thinks its “gay” to like people string on banjoes. when really that not new country, maybe if they listen so come new country and heard the lyrics and the means to the songs, maybe they would not judge it so badly if they gave it a chance. It is just like how people judge other people. I am not in the smarted group for our team and people make fun of me for being in the “dumb group” when really I did not work as hard as I could the year before and I am really smart if I like what I am learning. Yea I admit I’m lazy but I just hate how the people that make fun of my group turn around and ask ME for help with their math homework. If you look at a 7 year old kid and a 13 year old kid you would see a HUGE difference. with 7 it was so easy then and no one judged you if you said “I like country” they would say “o I like rap but country sounds really good” I mean when you were 7 you could not mach and not have name brand cloths and that would not change who your friends are. But with a 13 year old it’s more like “I don’t like the color pink.” “Well girls like that color so you’re not a girl.” at 13 it was more like you wore name brand clothes or else. You thought about stuff that your friends liked and did not care about what you liked because if others don’t care about it then why should I. at 13 it was more fitting in the being yourself. When people say stand up even when you stand alone, I really would love to see them do that. Being a teen is not standing up for yourself its hiding your true self so you don’t have to worry about standing up. No one wants to be left out so we change. Is the change always good? No it never is, but it is a change none the less and by the time we realize we don’t like the person we have become it is too late. So when people say not to trust you because of one thing that happened, just ignore it, or when people say wear Hollister or we are not friends, don’t be their friend and laugh at them for spending $30 on a t-shirt that will rip in a day.  Also the saying “shut up, you have no friends and no one likes you.” that hurts and it gets me mad too. Because just cause your friends are not mine does not mean that no one likes me. and they have no idea how bad that hurts because 1) it lowers myself esteem and makes me start to believe them and 2) is makes me feel stupid for just letting them get away with saying that. also when people say “you’re a band geek” yea it hurts a little but to tell you the truth I’m proud to be a band geek because it should that I am better then you at something and I use my spare time wisely. Also when people say “you such a nerd.” that hurts to because it’s like well if that’s a bad thing then I should not raise my hand as much or I should not read this. When did being smart become a bad thing? Remember when people look at you inside and not the outside? I don’t. When I tell people I want to tryout for the football team they laugh at me because football is for guys, well this girl wants to be on the team and that is that.

To the adults. I don’t know how to put this nicely but…. don’t yell at us for the drama we tell you about just be happy we are telling you stuff, don’t freak when me miss a homework assignment because then we get more mad and miss more stuff. but mostly, DONT be TOO protective, it will just make us rebel, you are just going to have to come to terms that we are growing up and you have to trust us.

This is what the answers to the questions above should have been.

 If some offered for you to have a record deal and tour with your favorite band, but you had to leave your school and home and be home schooled and live on the road. Would you take it? Yea. Why? Because it would be a great opportunity for me and it is my dream to tour with my favorite band.

If you could go to the best school ever, but you had to leave your friends and live in a different state for high school. Would you do it? yea. Why? Because that would be really good for my learning and I could get into a better collage, my friends would hate it but they would have to deal and my parents would be happy for me, because I did work for it.

If someone offered you pot. Would you take it? No. why? Because I don’t want to. But everyone is doing it. I don’t care I don’t want to. This will make you so uncool. no it will make me uncool to the people that already don’t like me and I’m fine with that because I have my friends.

You ask me to explain how I love you but to tell you the truth, explaining how I love you is like explain what water tastes like, explain why the sky is blue, why waves crash onto the sand. Impossible.

Life is like the beach, and the people are the waves. The waves are going through a huge journey to get to the beach (but they do not know it is death), they hit the rocks (drama and boys) get caught in currents (pear pressure). But when you look at the ocean waves do you see them hit the rocks and just stop there and die, no, you see the wave continue and move on. And yea there is some left behind but the wave still moves. They also do not know what comes ahead and what is on the beach but that does not stop them from moving and working their way to the beach, no, they still continue there way to the end and work to get there. So when people say life is like a beach well it is there is no doubt about that.